January 10, 2017 by magicalmothering
Can Distraction be a good thing?
Distractions can create connection or distrust…choose carefully!
Peaceful distractions create a space of peace and connection while changing the current flow of behavior. When using distractions be mindful of the needs of the one being distracted. Remembering that most needs can be fulfilled with attention and connection.
When your child is throwing a fit, and unable to control themselves we often want to distract them. Our society often promotes stifling feelings, control or dominating our children into submission so they bend to our will. This is not the type of distraction I am talking about!
We want to create space for our children to feel fully, while getting their needs met. We want them to know that being angry or frustrated, sad or hurt are completely acceptable, but we do want them also to know that life doesn’t have to stay in the space. Letting our children feel their feelings is a big part of our mothering role. Yet there are times that having a peaceful distraction, like when they see something at the grocery store that there is no way you are buying. You can pull out of your back pocket to create connection rather than a tantrum!!
My favorite peaceful distraction tool is storytelling. A good story can pull you on an adventure to create a magical space around you. When a story is used to distract you can create the space to really pull a child in. I share an example in the Facebook Video. You can find it in the Magical Mothering Facebook Group.
The other distraction I use frequently to shift the energy in my home is singing. When we sing we actually change the vibration and frequency of the energy around us. It is scientifically proven that music and singing can change energy!
This is why lullabies work so well. But we can use singing to create moods of silliness, adventure, exploration, and so much more!
So I will admit that peaceful distraction is not the easy choice or the immediate way we react, yet, but it is a choice that always creates more connection, joy and peace in our home. When we practice peaceful distraction in a way that nurtures our children and pulls them in, we are creating safe sacred space for feelings, trust and love to build into a firm foundation for them to build the rest of their lives upon.
I would love to hear how this post has inspired you to thinking more outside the box towards a more peaceful, loving way to handle the tantrums, the control issues and the big emotions that our little loves in our life bring to us!